What’s with 13?

What’s with 13?

Others would say, it’s another ordinary number, some people might say this is a bad number, maybe because they somehow, relate it to Friday the Thirteenth. I remember my mom always remind me to stay at home every time the date, 13, falls on Friday, she said, worse things happen on Friday the Thirteenth. In my case, however, this number represents the date where my life had faced a new chapter. A day which flipped my entire 18^th life into waking up and knowing that someone is waiting for me, wishes for my existence and longs for my presence. But on the contrary, this date also signifies the broken bond that I had with someone.

Eleven months, 352 days, 8447.92 hours, and 506,875 min ago, at the same room and in the same bed where I have been sleeping, with my lights off , in the middle of the night, while everyone are sleeping and using the same phone that is now in my mom’s possession, was when I chose to accept this man as my other half, to face every succeeding days with him at my side, to accept every single harsh words my parents could say, the very day when I had to say “I’m taken”

The first day, yeah sure, I’d have to admit, everything seemed to be perfect knowing that I wasn’t alone. On the next days and months, there were lots of “firsts”, first kiss, first hug, first date, first “HHWW” with someone. There were also cute moments that until now, haunts me in depths of my mind. Yeah, as there is never a “Perfect” relationship, we had also faced a lot of misunderstandings and hardships that really cost that droplet of water to run from our cheeks and fall down on our hands.  As we were both new to these “relationship” thingy, we were still trying to adjust.

What’s difficult about getting into a relationship is that the feelings that you had with someone is affected by the fact that you both have to commit. Indeed, commitment complicates everything. Yes, it was fun but at the same time, it was hard. I was pressured. I tried my best not to act so childish; to love myself more so wouldn’t feel the insecurities. In the end though, this was one of the reasons which pushed him to fall out…

At first, I thought, it’s nothing, that it’s normal, that everything’s fine and that nothing is wrong. I completely shut the idea of him falling out. But no matter how I try to close my eyes… I couldn’t get myself believe that the reason why I’m there, still exists. Right after he left for vacation, he slowly forgotten the fact that I was still there... It was hard and painful, God knows how many nights I’ve cried for the same reason… I wouldn’t want to believe it but reality had slapped it right in my face after seeing “that” I cried and cried, I wouldn’t want to believe that he has chosen his best friend over me, his girlfriend. I was angry with that girl, I admit. How could she act like that when I know for sure that she knew I exist? How could she? I understand that they’re close but should it really get to that point? It was painful to realize that he’s far more interested to talk and spend his time on that girl… He told me the reason though… he said his best friend has been suffering from a disease, and I don’t know If I’d believe that… I had cried a countless times, and he didn’t knew any of it, neither is that woman who acts as if this man is his “boyfriend”. But guess what? “I had to spend my time with her, coz she’s sick and you’re not” was the very line he threw right when he got back… I was preparing myself for a break-up but I was left speechless as he threw these words in front of me… IT WAS PAINFUL! And it still is… That’s the time I had chosen to leave… even when it’ll cost a lot of suffering and pain and tortures brought by the memories. But do I have a choice?

Now, five months had passed, but why am I still feeling that tinge of pain, the reality that I lost someone I treasured much just because of his best friend? What’s even more hurtful? It’s when the news broke that he has someone now to call “Girlfriend” and guess who? the very reason why I waved the white flag, YES, IT’S HIS BEST FRIEND.

Would you say I’m stupid? That I am the most stupid person on earth because I couldn’t get myself MOVE ON completely… The past kept me on the dark side… though I tried to divert my attention, just out of nowhere, my memory of him pops up…

In a few days, this number would then again remind me of the times we had, and I’m not sure how I’d face it, now that I know, he’s with the person I had once hated…

29 Signs a Guy Likes You

We girls sometimes are just too curious about BOYS, ain’t that right?  Oo naman noh! Well, honestly, I myself really want to know if ever we have a mutual understanding with the person I admire. Hmm.. and thanks to my source, she shared me this one. As I was reading this, anyway, I was dead expecting to have a positive result… it turned out, however, that these signs just remind me of someone but not the other significant someone.. how sad uy! :(

29 Signs a guy Likes You

1. He will ask you if you ever have a boyfriend. [syempre to make sure na may chance xa sa’yo no! Sayang rin naman ang effort?]
2. Texts you a lot.
3. He will lean towards you during a conversation.
4. He stares at you, I mean, A LOT!
5. Calls you with a name no one has ever called you. [of course, he wants to create a special bond between the two of you, gumagawa ng foundation ika nga..]
6. Acts weird when you’re around with the other boys.
7. Asks a lot about your favorites.
8. Does you favors.
9. Protective of you.
10. Gets jealous when you talk to other guys.
11. Remembers everything, take note! EVERYTHING you said.
12. Shows off to impress you.
13. When you’re around, he acts immature with his friends and gazes over at you to see if you think it’s funny.
14. Playfully tease you.
15. Always smiling when he’s around you.
16. Ask your friends about you.
17. He’ll tickle you to hear you laugh.
18. Follows you around
19. Say your name a lot.
20. Watch his friend, do they grin at him when you walk past?
21. He might also act nervous around you.
22. If he can choose seat, of course, he’ll sit beside you.
23. He will walk slowly beside you in the hallways at school.
24. Calls you for no exact reason at all.
25. Apologizes for the mistakes his friends made when they make fun of you.
26. If you’re listening to your ipod he’ll want to listen too.
27. He will talk to the person next to you and act like you’re not there.
28. Says sorry for every little thing like accidentally touch you.
29. If your shoulders or legs touch he won’t move away.

Well, well, are any of these 29 signs familiar to you? Reminds you of someone? Hope you had a good vision on who that is.

Thanks for reading! :)

 

Iligan City Junior Eagle’s Club 3rd Batch of Recruitment

                    Before September ended, ICJEC had planned for recruitment, only this time, we were targeting a mass recruitment.  To do that, Kuya Khert designed our poster which will be posted on different schools here in Iligan, including Mindanao State University – Iligan Institute of Technology, Lyceum and St. Michael’s College and even on places or establishments where bunch of crowds could check up on. Likewise, to be able to reach and gather more attention from everyone here in Iligan, our Kuya had also created an ICJEC website showcasing different activities and services the organization has done on the previous years, as well as the goals, missions and vision of the Iligan City Junior Eagles Club. Luckily, this website was created right on one the most popular social networking sites i.e. Facebook, which has not only given the people info’s on our organization but has also given them the chance to register online.

Float Parade

As part of the celebration of Iligan City's Diyandi Festival, Float Parade served as one of the highlights and the ICJEC (Iligan City Junior Eagles Club) were one of the participants.

September 28,2011, the day before the festival, marked the date for the event.

I was one of those who will have to stand for hours in our float hence, I was forced to wake up as early as 4:30 in the morning so I could prepare for the activity. However, it has been my nature to be.. uhmm, quite slow in preparing things [yung mag eat gale? mag pa wafa pa light.. and all, gurl thing, kung baga!] so it turned out, na late pa rin ako :( and worse! I kind of forgot where Erlinda Compound is, the place where we, my ate and kuya, will have to meet. So what I did, I walked the street where there were lots of people, hoping to find them, and with God's grace! Kuya Arvie found me with his motorcycle, and so we drove off to the compound where I finally saw my ate and kuya! [haizt! kataas sa akong journey, padulong pa gani ko sa compound ha, how much more ang parade?]

Before our float, rode its way to the streets of Iligan, [char?] Farrah, my best friend, had a tiny, little, misunderstanding with me [yeah... i really felt guilty] and with someone whose name should no longer be mentioned. That tiny, little misunderstanding was only caused by the issue on what costume should i wear, as I was representing the Cebuana [not the CEBUANA, but the other Cebuana, a.k.a, mga taga Cebu okemz?] She brought with her, a dress that she'd want me to put on, the dress which according to her, "the reason why she's late" however, someone negated this idea and insisted that I should not change my outfit. For this reason, Farrah felt annoyed, and quite mad.. Imagine, the struggles she had just to bring that dress for me? That she had also ran from their jeepney just to cope up with the traffic. aww so so sorry for that Far...

Ate Lourenz in the middle, along with Ate Mae and Kuya Jhay

Anyway, going back to the said event, as I've said, nakita ko na sila diba, around 8am, the flaot parade began. [Note: hastang iniita na jud ni!] As we strted the event,it was somehow, overwhelming to witness such a huge crowd, who, along with us, sacrificed and endured the pain caused by the burning heat of daylight, just so they could witness the said event.To ease their suffering though, we threw some candies to them, some were smiling, esp. the kids, but some were shouting "Shamcey!", pertaining these to our Ate Chicks slash Ate Lourenz Remitillo who has been the pride of Philippines, as well as the ICJEC, for being  the First Filipina crowned as Miss Supranational.

Kuya Bonn, with me at the right-hand side and Ate Mae 

 This was taken before the parade started, right after Farrah had her emote mode [hehe..] and yeah! I look like I'm only attending a JS Prom. Not to mention the outfit! look'n familiar? yeah yeah, that's the same dress I wore last Anniversary, but hey! I had no other option ye know? I was informed that there were no available costume for Cebuana at the last minute, so that makes me the "unprepared participant" :P

On the other hand,  the event ended up successfully. We all felt, quite sunburned, tired and worse, hungry and thirsty, but I felt satisfied for what I did. Never in my life did I imagined to be a part of such event, usually I am one of the observers but on that day, I became a part of the Object to be observed haha! :}

Ate Lourenz along with her escort Kuya Khert in his Chinese attire

The eagle which represents our organization

Taken after the event with Ate Mae

Ate Lourenz almost seemed to be a popular artist who had joined the event, people around us just keep on popping out, asking for a  picture... kulang na lang magpa autograph! :))

Ate Lourenz with kuya Arvie

We had a blast! This was the Iligan's first time to hold a float parade featuring the different organizations recognized in the city.

ICJEC Applicants’ Twilight

 

August 8, 2011 was the D-day. We finally came to our last stage of being an applicant, the bridge in becoming an official member of ICJEC.

[Left to Right] Front line : I, Ate Mae, and Ate Farrah

Geez, as I recall that day, we were really that nervous! I mean, how would you feel being introduced to a more than 20 guests from Ozamis City, Junior Eagles Club Chapter? Can you just imagine how fast my heart was pounding as I was standing in front of this crowd who stares like, I don’t know, they seem to eat me! Quite ironic though, there were only 6 of us applicants and yet the number of guests is surprisingly that big!

[Left to Right] Second Line : Kuya James, Kuya Jan and Kuya Mig

Hmmm.... sabeh walang touch? Explain this to meh!

What made us really, really nervous was when the initiation started, we were all blind folded, we had no idea of what’s going to happen next, or what will be the things that we’d do, there were a lot of questions going through our minds, what only kept us from where we were that day is the trust that we took from the words of our kuya’s and ate’s, that the Junior Eagles Club completely discourages any form of brutality during the initiation, that it’s  an anti-hazing Fraternity. And gladly, we didn’t regret, they did not fail us. However, that didn’t mean we had been taken cared of like little prince and princesses! No! They made us do things which umm, shall I say, disgusting? wait, but it was really funny though! That was the only time I did something I had never thought I would do! Moreover, we were also interviewed by some of the members of the OCJEC screening committee... and ugh! I was the last one to be interviewed. While I was waiting for my turn, I was wondering why some of my co-applicants were teary eyed as they finished the interview, I thought they were just being so, sensitive or emotional kind of things, and I even protested that I would NEVER shed a single tear! Coz who would’ve thought that it was going to be like that?! The questions were not like the things I’ve thought of. Finally, as I took my turn, gosh… they all thought I wasn’t serious coz of all the applicants, I was told that I was the only one who gets to smile once in a while, [huhu… they really had no idea that my heart was already pounding hard!] don’t I have the right to smile then? Well, they don’t get it, some people smile to hide what they really feel, and I am a member of such. They said things which umm... tickled my nature… know what that is? I’m cry-baby for God’s sake! Oh, well, I ended up hugging our ICJEC president, [wait, when I think about that, what the hell did I hugged him for?] I don’t know, I just wanted to cry…

Finally, the last stage, announcement of who have passed the initiation… again! This part was one of the heart breaking, jaw dropping, moments! As Kuya Jhay announced the new members… obviously, we were all nervous!! Ate Mae and Ate Farrah were the first two whose names had been called, third was Kuya Jan, whose application form was torn out for being so confident that he’ll be accepted…aww, I was happy for them, but I was also praying my name would be called… unfortunately I was asked one last question why I should be a member of the club, and same goes for Kuya Migs and Kuya James. My heart was thumping hard, while Farrah and Ate mae were all crying for us.. gee… Kuya Jhay added that out of us three, Kuya James, Kuya Migs and I, only one name will be called as one of the newly accepted member and the other two will have to leave… I was already dead nervous!! When Kuya said, that the last member will be the person who doesn’t wear a white T-shirt… we were kind of confused, what he said didn’t sink  in instantly, but as we look upon the t-shirts, I realize Kuya Jhay was actaully referring to me!!! Gosh!!! You know how happy I was?! I burst out into tears!! The nicest feeling for that day is to know you’re finally a member!! Sadly, we cried for feeling sorry for our two other co-applicant…  Kuya thanked them for all the efforts they did, and yeah, we all cried… we almost believed that!! ALMOST!  When He declared that all of us 6 applicants were actually accepted!! Gosh!!! Another turn of events! That moment marked the start of being a member of the ICJEC, us girls were obviously the ones who got so emotional, hehe… All our Ate’s and Kuya’s welcomed us and we were so touched! haha!! I can’t imagine that I was really an official member! XDD

Great show somehow! Kuya Jhay is indeed a good actor! Haha!! 

After the acceptance, ICJEC and OCJEC

Hey! I'm an Applicant

Did it ever came to your mind of becoming a social worker? Donating things which can, in some way, provide what people need like clothing, school supplies for the kids, foods, medical missions and more? Yeah, I bet you did, especially when you're still that kid with the innocent and pure heart? hmm?

Back when I was young, ughh.. a little bit younger, I had thought of becoming a social worker, sort of, I don't know how I came up with such idea but maybe because, as a child, seeing those street children with their old ripped out clothes and their tiny little bodies which grew accustomed to the burning heat of daylight and to the cold nights as they lay themselves on that ice-cold pavement that we occasionally walk through, you just can't help but feel sorry for them. That as their pitiful, begging eyes stare on that food you were holding while spreading their hands; giving then the food seemed to be the right thing to do. Even when you were a child, however, you know all too well that these were not obviously enough, and in that instant, you'd say "What I can do for now may just be so little to accommodate everyone of you but one day, I'll make sure, I'll be coming back armed with enough things to help you guys out." [hmmmm... typical childish thoughts ey? Nah... you're wrong, when I said those line, I was dead serious!]

Such thoughts remained as a thought until my best friend Farrah, invited me to join  ICJEC - Iligan City Junior Eagles Club, an organization which aims to provide the needy with services they can offer, such as, feeding program, outreach program, medical missions, and a whole lot more!! I was so happy and got very excited to hear the news but the moment she added that, this is no ordinary organization and is actually a fraternity... well, I started doubting, not only will it make my parents upset but of course, I, as an innocent young lady [char! assuming..] with a very very tiny body almost fragile enough to take any form of hazing!?? will this move be reasonable? Hell no!! BUT, my best friend assured me that this organization we were about to join, completely discourages any form of brutality, so as her friend.. yeah, I trusted her word and proved that she wasn't bluffing or anything..

Recovery

Three months ago, my world turned to face the biggest challenge in my life and that was letting go of someone who portrayed a big role in my 18th life. Yeah, things were not easy and to cope up with such loss, I tried to open myself to things I've been wanting to do i.e biking as early as 4:30 in the morning, blogging, be in an organization, eat lots of ice scream and all other bunch of things I use to distract myself, to divert my attention, obviously, to lighten up things a bit and forget about how I feel for a while. It's just quite funny though, I remember doing some of these things right after THAT day, and my mom told me, "I think you're really going crazy" (eyes gazing and with a look saying "GOD will she really be fine?") Now, how's that for a comfort, ey?

Gladly, a few days later, I came to realize that what happened was one of the ways to show me that there's more to life, that God made it happen because He has something better to give. I suddenly believe in that saying "there never is a pain that comes without a purpose". I know someday, we'll both realize that we did the right thing. Though there might be some regrets and tinges of pain, I'd still thank that man for everything that he did, for making me realize how beautiful it is to fall in love.

Oopz, Am I getting overly sentimental here? haha! Excuse my overt nature..
Well, well, I think i'm done here, and the million dollar question, "Have I moved on?"


answer: NO WAY!! I'll never gonna move on! --- hey!? you believe that? ahahaha!! JUST KIDDING!!  [whoa, I bet, I'd get a big slap on my face if Farrah would hear me shout this one] Of course, I've moved on.. I've learned my lesson and hopefully when I meet that right guy, I wouldn't go left, hehehe...